Ok… I didn’t read the entire thread… my bad. But wanted to post to this thread even if  I do have to actually get some work done here today. LOL.

Like a lot of you I started riding as a kid and when I came back I didn’t expect to have a fear issue. Was I wrong! But I also found I worked through it with a couple of close calls at coming off.  I also found that just staying alert has made the difference. If  I’m aware of the horse and sitting up straight, even while I’m having a conversation about my daughter or what I like in my latte, that if she spooks at something I stay planted. It’s been the times I let my attention stray, and started acting like I was in an easy chair that I’ve come closer to coming off.

I do most of my riding in a ring (hunter/jumpers). So I don’t have the same fear of being out on a trail alone when something happens. I think the list of precautions made at the beginning of the thread is excellent and I guess I’m a firm believer that if at all possible riding shouldn’t be done alone and if it has to let someone know you’ve gone to ride and when to get worried if they don’t hear back from you.

All of that having been said… my heart still consistently jumps into my throat when I feel like her stride is too long and we’re coming into a corner. This is good and common sense, but it’s also fueled by the memory of freak accident that took my friends life.

I’ve just come to the conclusion that the best defense is a good offense! A strong deep seat, staying aware, and a helmet!  :)

Hi to all:

I'm new to the site and also I'm somewhat of a new "older" rider at age 40.  I've taken English lessons while in my 30's and had to stop because we moved out of the area.    

While taking those lessons, my first lesson on "FEAR" came when I was doing really well and advancing through the different lesson horses I fell off when the leather separated from the saddle while doing a 18" crossrail, however, I landed like a cat.  The owner was very impressed about that.  I on the other hand, second guessed whether or not I should continue.  Of course I got the "if you fall off, you got to get back on" of which I'm glad.  The rest of the ride was great.  

Unforturtately, I've had injuries, broken ankle/toe, from riding the line too close to the fence post, rider error, horse was trying to stay on course and fallen off a x-barrel horse, he saw the barrel and I saw the fence, once again I got back on went a few rounds at the w/t to build my confidence. 

Well, last year I was riding with some friends, on a horse I'd only ridden once, and he was totally different than from our first ride. I should have known then to get off.  He was having a bad day (August heat in the East) and hadn't been ridden in weeks.  Me not being on a horse in a few years, regularly, forgot what some of the horse jesters and behaviors were.  We were doing fine until he wouldn't stop trotting at my request, he went into a canter, (should of lounged him to take some of the edge off) and shaken his head from left to right and me giving mixes signels, next thing I knew, I was going over his head.  Talk about seeing your life flash before your eyes (and his) .  He was just as startled as I was. He just froze.  My friends only saw my flying through the air.  Once they caught him and got to me, I just laid there.  I knew something was broken, I couldn't breath. One of the ladies checkd me out to see if I had broken anything, thankfully I hadn't.  Once I was okay and breathing normally, had feeling in my legs (jello legs) and realized that I was still alive, my friend made me get back on "her" horse and walked him.  I really hated her.  I was SCARED, but he was very accommodating.  I shook the whole way back to the barn telling him, it was my fault and that I'd only be grooming from then on.

Unfortunalty, I haven't been back, partly because of my FEAR, the weather and me possibly having MS.  But, because I've been reading this thread, I'm determined to get back to the barn and into the saddle, even if it's only at the walk.   

Thanks to everyone who posted an encourageing word. Life is to be enjoyed and I really enjoyed my time with horses. 

YH

LianeJ,

I'm going to get that book.  My outlook on life is having a Positve Attitude, like the old saying "if life gives you lemons, make lemonade".  I'm going to be making a lot of lemonade, starting this weekend.

Thanks! 

Hi, and welcome!  Boy, you've had some experiences, haven't you?  Seems with horses, there are just about always some of those....don't think I know any horse friends who don't have a story or two to tell.  I'm so glad you are wanting to continue riding.  Think you had an excellent point about riding again, even if it is just at a walk.  So what if it is?  If you are having fun, that's what matters.  When I started riding again as an "older rider" I was very timid at first, and was surrounded by hunter jumper folks who sailed by me right and left.  I decided I was going to do this at my own pace, no matter how slow, as long as I was okay with it.  I'm glad I did; it has helped me to not try and ride more than I am capable of, and now, I can gallop with the best of them (sometimes...)  But I love nice peaceful walking rides, too.  Best de-stressor I have!  Let us know how you are doing, and just have fun!

Reading your post just reminded me of something I had totally forgotten, since I now live on a farm, and ride all over the place.  When I started riding again, I took many lessons, which of course were in arenas of various shapes and sizes.  Once I started riding out on trails, etc., riding in an arena made me very nervous.  Probably still would if I had one to ride in.  But once I got out the gate I was just fine.  Has anyone else had this experience?  I have gone off horses in arenas, but probably more outside them.  So I don't think I am afraid of being hurt, maybe just the confinement?

Briahna's Mom:

When I was younger, I didn't fear being bucked off or falling off or getting dumped at a jump, I just rode.  I got bucked off, fell off when my horse spooked and landed a few jumps without my horse.  No big deal, I just rolled with it.  Now that I'm over 50, I worry about losing my balance and falling off my horse.  I really worry about getting injured.  My reflexes aren't as sharp as they used to be and my strength is no where near what I used to have and my weight is, well how do I put it politely....I've gained weight.

I know, from all the information available from sources like Equisearch, so much more about riding even though I've never been formally trained.  But still I worry about falling off and getting hurt.

(Did I mention I have an Arabian?)

Does any one out there have any exercises or mind strategies to help with this?

WOW!  I feel better now!!!!  LOL!!!!!!

I always knew we needed our very own 50+ forum for riding questions like these.  Thank you Equisearch!  Just look at all the great posts here.  So many older riders feel the same as I do in this regard.  I don't know if it is because of the 15 year hiatus without horses, or just the getting older and "wiser" as one post suggested.  All I know is I"ve had some great information set forth, the Riding Positively website is great.  So is the Grey Horse Matters website.  If you haven't gone yet, please check then out.  Some great books to read, gotta get to the library.  So many other "Hints and Helps", just what I was looking for!

I do lunge Bri at least once a week, or after a "rain delay" in our regular scheduled rides.  Not necessarily to make her tired, but from all I've learned from the natural trainers, the constant changes in direction and transitions from walk to lope to trot, I'm asserting my leadership of her and she always is a trusting ride when we go out after the round pen work.  Using the word "Wisdom" instead of "Fear", that's a great one!  My Bri is pretty calm at 25 years old, last Saturday "HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRIAHNA!".  But she is an Arab.  She is so much more aware of her surroundings than any other horses I've ridden or owned.  We hardly ride in the arena, only when the park or the trail across the street is too muddy.  So the majority of what we do is trail ride.  I ride by myself during the week and with friends on the weekends.  I do need to become a better athelete, now I can do it for her, not just for me!!!!  Strength training, flexibility training, yes, I need those.  I really like the idea of Meditation via horseback too!  I tried it today in the park, eyes closed on a safe riding trail, breathing yoga breaths, smelling the eyculuptus trees, all the green stuff that has come up from the rain, chanting "Now", being in the moment.....It was so relaxing!!!!

Bri is a very smooth riding horse, you can sit her trot without any problems, small horse, soft movements.  So even if she does spook, spin or a four foot hoof plant, it is done very gracefully!!!!  LOL!!!  So really, the problem is an irrational fear I have!  I too have hooked my sports bra over the saddle horn going up a hill!!!  I'm more flexible than I think I am, because you have to be once your horse thinks you are urging her on by hanging on her neck and swearing!

Maybe my fear is like one poster said, more of dying of embaressment than injuries!!!!!  Most times I ride alone, so that's probably not it.

Glad to see also under 50+s reading our posts.  The'll be there sometime, so this will give them something to think about.  Even a few new posters, gave them a reason to join our 50+ online horse community.

Thanks for all the great advice.  Practice, practice, practice....enjoy!

I will have to check out that other website.  I've gone to Positively Riding and think it's great too.  I also have an Arab, and have had several over the years.  Love your comment about spooking "gracefully"!  A very Arab thing, indeed.  I also ride alone, not always, but if I want to ride and my husband can't, I have no problem going out alone, altho I know it isn't recommended.  I think a little wisdom is valuable; when you become too relaxed is when bad things happen.  I think being relaxed is fine if you are also aware.  My present horse is fairly new and we are still getting used to each other.  I find him very sweet altogether, but with lots of energy, a great sense of humor, and just too cute!  I'm happy to hear someone else rides alone regularly.  I love having riding buddies, but also enjoy riding alone and enjoying my horse and my surroundings.  Happy riding!

Lynda

Hi there,  I know exactly how you feel:  

My balance isn't as good.  My reflexes are not as smooth or quick. And it hurts much worse when I come off. Strength and weight...same thing... not enough and too much, respectively!

1. I use to be the one that said - "I can ride anything you got".  Now you hear me say,  "I'll ride my own horse, thank you very much."
2. I started lifting dumb bell weights to build up strength in my arms.  (Biceps, Triceps, Shoulders) Started with 8 pounders and worked my way up to 30 pounds depending on the exercise.
3. Right now I'm sitting on a Pilate's exercise ball at my desk.  I practice balancing on the ball and also use it for ab kick outs; push ups; wall pliat(sp?) squats with a 20 pound weight and other exercises.  I started SLOW....but I started!
4. Pilate's has a styro foam roll that I use to also balance on and do sits ups or crunches. But it's the balance that is key for me. It also helps roll the tension out of your back.  (I had back surgery 3 years ago and partially blew out my right knee about a year ago.)
5. Chocolate.  Don't ever run out it.  I don't care what anyone else says....
6. I ride and I am also an Apprentice in training safe, sound recreational horses with a great trainer.  Primarily quarter horses. Although I do have a lovable Tennessee Walker with a great smooth gait....but most gaited horses move out much faster than the quarter horses. 
7. And I'm finding out that slow, safe horses with a nice low head carriage isn't such a bad deal after all.  Of course,  it took me buying the horse that I should of been riding when I was 20 to figure out that out! LOL!

When I grew up....you didn't go to a trainer.....you just got on and rode the horse.  Trainers are not such a bad thing now a days!

Note to Self:  BALANCE is not as good as it use to be.

Second Note to Self: Do NOT anticipate a horses's move!!!!

Dad gum it!  I just rolled off my TWH's back jumping the second 55 gal barrel!  Not his fault - he's a great horse!  Shoot! 

Landed on my right rear and elbow - in soft dirt.  Busted my pride and I'm SURE I'll have a big purple one tomorrow.

So let me add to my list.... don't sweat the small stuff...tomorrow's another day... AND
Crown and Diet Coke always helps afterwards!

Live, love and ride!

Boots

Just curious, I see a lot of you have Arabs!  I've been primarily been around quarters, paints and thoroughbreds. Am I missing something?   Once I've built my cofidence back up, I hope within the next year or so to look for my own "special" riding partner.  I've only been considering quarters and paints.  What made you choose Arabs?  Please enlighten me!

Y 

My first horse when I was 19 was an Arab; I was not searching for one, but she was for sale where I used to rent a trail horse on weekends.  Ever since I have had Arabs.  I have ridden many other breeds, and like them all.  Arabs have lots of personality, they are pretty hardy, and are quite smart.  They may not be for everyone because they do have so much energy.  But they are kind and sweet and full of personality.  I don't think they are for the occasional rider, because they do need exercise and work for their mind as well as their bodies.  All horses are wonderful, but Arabs are special in my heart.  Their brains and beauty make them fun horses to be around.  They are loyal to "their" person and can be a bit jealous of other horses.  A gelding I had years ago once nipped my arm because I fed a carrot to his pasturemate first (because he was closest!)  I'm sure that was the cause because no one ever knew of him nipping anyone before or after.  The gelding I have now is such a complete character and loves any sort of attention.  We also have a Quarter Horse gelding that my husband rides, and he is a very sweet guy, too.  But,,,,,he's not an Arab!  Guess that's the best explanation I have!  lol!

ameretouch:

Just curious, I see a lot of you have Arabs!  I've been primarily been around quarters, paints and thoroughbreds. Am I missing something?   Once I've built my cofidence back up, I hope within the next year or so to look for my own "special" riding partner.  I've only been considering quarters and paints.  What made you choose Arabs?  Please enlighten me!

All my life I loved Arabians.  Read all the books.  Drew their pictures.  My first horse was a gaited horse (not exactly sure what kind, I was 12 and bought him from the local horse dealer and he could do this incredible gait where he pumped his front legs so high and riding was so comfortable), maybe a ???? but not a Tennesee Walker.  Too big to be a Saddlebred.  Who knows?  I never will.  Then I traded him for a grade paint horse I had green broken for the local horse dealer.  Owned and loved him for so many years, he was the horse my kids learned to ride on, finally had to put him down because of naviculiar disease at about 28 years old.  The Quarter Horse mare I bought for my husband had to be put down at the same time due to a rattlesnake bite that sent the inflamation to her hock, swelled to a small watermelon size and never got better.  I was out of horses.

I raised my kids, had a career, lived life but never forgot about my love for Arabians.  Then my adult daughter told me her hairdresser was looking for someone to help her ride a horse she was half leasing.  I jumped at the chance and guess what???  She was an Arab!  The lady who owned her was pregnant with her first child and had leased the mare out to keep her ridden.  I assumed the half lease and then the owner became pregnant with her second when her first was still in diapers and I knew the handwriting was on the wall.  I told the owner if she would ever consider selling this mare, to please give me first consideration.  She called me back the next week and I became the proud owner of an Arabian Horse!!!!!  The Gods finally smiled on me!!!!

She is the most personable horse I've ever been around.  She loves people!  She is so sensitive to aids and voice commands I can ride her bareback with a rope around her neck and guide her with my legs and seat and voice.  I put a little kid on her back and she just walks around like she knows she has precious cargo aboard.  They can hang on her hocks, she just stands there, not moving like she knows not to hurt them.  She can have a 'tude from time to time, but it never lasts very long.  She's 25 years young as of February 23rd this year and she is still a blast to ride.  She's totally aware of what's going on all around us.  I have to remember to tune her in.  Example:  I'm riding along by myself down a trail in the forest and she keeps turning her head slightly from side to side and her ears are totally tuned into something behind us.  I finally turn to look behing us and there is a runner maybe 100 yards behind us.  That's an entire football field away, but she heard him and was tuning in way before he was that close.  She loves galloping up hills and loping on the straightaways!!!!  Yet she will walk willingly on a loose rein just taking in the view around us.

I know at 25 she is an old horse but her health is good despite the Cushing's Disease diagnosed last year.  Her vet, Dr. P says she will live to a ripe old age, now that she is getting her Pergolide.  Once she passes over the Rainbow Bridge, I plan on my next horse being an Arab too.  I'm hooked!

I can't tell you how great it was to read everyone's comments on this string! So good in fact that I have just joined so I could tell you. 

My story is very similar as I rode from about 7 to 22 then gave up my horses and now at the tender age of 44 have reentered the horsey world.  Wow there is so much catching up to do and things have changed.  I used to laugh when I fell off but am definitely very aware that I wont bounce now which has made me very cautious. 

About six months ago I bought a 9yr old pally quarter horse who has given me back my confidence.  He is so fantasticly reliable and solid that I started riding bareback again which is what I love doing. I love him but once my confidence returned I wanted another arab (my first love) and was lucky enough to find my dream horse a couple of weeks ago.  He is a black 3yr old egyptian arab with a very sweet nature but total opposite to my quarter horse.  I have ridden him bareback but will stick to the saddle now until we both know and trust each other better as everything is so scary at the moment,  He has never been riden on trails before - it took me 10 mins coaxing to try and get him over a little ditch the other day until I got off and led him over several times and then remounted and he crossed with no problem at all.  We both have a lot to learn.

 You guys have given really good advice and I will start to wear my helmet again! There is just one thing that I would like to add - I think it is important to have a really secure saddle.  I have a wintec stock pro with swinging fenders and it is so comfortable I can ride in shorts (its pretty hot here) but more importantly it fits me very neatly and the pads are quite large.  Even with a good side ways shy I stay put and I probably would have fallen before now without it. 

The other great thing about riding again and all the associated activity that comes with horses, is I am fitter, much more flexible now and my muscles are stronger.  I have had a weak back for years but that has improved out of sight. There are some undeniable risks with riding but the benefits more than outweight them. The yoga and pilates will be worth investigating!

Thanks for your inspiration and its nice to know that I am not alone in returning (at an older age) to this most wonderous passtime.

Hi there and welcome! I am fairly new here myself, and have enjoyed these posts so much.  Like you, I am a returning rider, and it's good to have such a great group who are also returning riders.  Your horses sound wonderful; your new Arab must be gorgeous for sure!  Arabs are my first love, too, and have had several over the years.  I recently bought a wonderful grey gelding, and we are going thru the "getting to know each other" thing, too.  This past year or so, I got a synthetic saddle for the first time, and boy, do I like it!  Its comfy for me and the horses I have put it on.  I had a wonderful old leather saddle that kept getting heavier as I got older and when I found out the tree was broken in it, I found the synthetic and, needing a saddle in a hurry, got it.  Glad I did!  I rode as a kid til I was around 20, then got away from riding for over 25 years.  I've been back for awhile now, and can't think of anything I would rather do for fun and relaxation.  There are so many knowledgeable people here, I've learned much and highly recommend it.  And yes!  Please wear your helmet!

Lynda